I never wanted kids.

There, I said it.

I never wanted kids, but as it turns out – I have two of them. They aren’t ‘mine mine’, they are ‘someone else’s mine’.

At age 38, I arrived somewhat late to parenthood. I dragged my heels, went the long way round, and actively avoided anything parent-related, but eventually I reluctantly waded into the world of step-parenthood.

At first, it was rough. Really rough. My mantra became: ‘nup, I’m done. I can’t do this.’

But here I am, still hard at it with two kids that I have to admit, are ok. Probably more than ok, if I’m honest. They’re good kids. But it’s still hard, and I have no expectations that it’s going to get any easier for a long time yet.

I don’t really talk to anyone about parenting, mainly because I don’t hang out with other parents. In fact, I’m pretty keen on avoiding them. I’m sure they are all great people with some interesting stories, but they are the ‘bios’ and I’m the ‘step’. For some reason, the pre-fix ‘step’ seems to suggest I don’t really know what it’s like to be a parent. And maybe I don’t. But I am a parent, and I’m doing my best for these two kids.

This blog is for all the other ‘steps’ who are doing their best…